Marriage counseling is a much better option than divorce. A 1995 report by Consumer Reports showed that 67 percent couples were happy about visiting their marriage counselor. If you have certain misgivings about marriage counseling, answers to some basic questions given below should quell your apprehension.
1. How do I know if I need marriage counseling?
If your marriage has hit rock bottom, but you want save the marriage and repair the relationship, you should seek out counseling. If you and your spouse fight constantly, threaten to leave or divorce each other, are thinking of cheating or already did and are dealing with the fall out, or there are substance abuse problems, counseling can help.
2. How is it going to help me?
A marriage counselor will listen to all your problems and offer you valuable advice and solutions to help you save your marriage. It may take the form of structured conversations, mediation, substance abuse treatment, or therapeutic sessions about honesty and communication. You and your spouse will get to the core of the problem in your marriage and learn how to communicate successfully.
3. Can marriage counseling really save my marriage?
It is entirely up to you. Marriage counseling is a form of therapy, and it can be healing, but only if you allow it to be. You will have the path shown to you but whether you want to traverse the path is completely your decision.
4. Who should I approach for marriage counseling?
There are many people you can approach for marriage counseling. There are also these professional marriage counselors that you find, and some spiritual leaders also offer the service. You can turn to family or a friend, but it should be an objective third party, which can be hard for someone related to you or your spouse.
5. Is it an expensive proposition?
Marriage counseling is like a psychiatric therapy session. The expense depends on the severity of the problem and the number of sittings that you need to have with the counselor. Like any other service, some marriage therapists are going to charge more and some are going to charge less.
6. I feel uneasy sharing my marital problems. How can I go to a counselor?
Before you go to a counselor you must make up your mind to communicate totally. There is really no result that you will get if you don’t tell the counselor about the extent of your problem or share the exact details of the problem.
7. Why are there so many divorces when marriage counselors are available?
Marriage counseling does not guarantee that your marriage will be saved. It will educate you about communication and help you get at the root of the disagreements and problems. In the end it is up to you and your spouse to make your marriage work. Moreover, people tend to approach divorce lawyers more than marriage counselors. If it was the other way round, the number of divorces should definitely come down.
8. Can I go to marriage counselor before I get married?
Yes, indeed. It can be a great way to make sure you and your partner are prepared to take the marital plunge. You will receive valuable advice about this new life that you are now looking to start. From physical intimacy to financial management and managing time and space – there are some intrinsic points related to marriage that you can address before you wed.
9. Can I counsel my partner?
Of course you can. In fact, if you take out time to listen to your partner and communicate clearly, you become the best counselor possible.
10. What do I need to do after meeting my marriage counselor?
You need to follow what the counselor asked you to do. This will take courage and honesty but the end result will be fantastic.
